On Instilling Discipline Part 4

Before I move on to the rest of my list, I feel that I should address the messages left by other moms! You guys always have something good to add!

When we make up our house rules, we always figure in a bit of flexibility. The rules are not always black and white and our reaction to the children's behavior, both positive and negative, is fluid. Our rules change as the children mature and their needs change. Our rules will also change as the children have a particular behavior to work on.

Sometimes when we issue a punishment, we will give the child a second chance. For example, I've warned Morgan about her behavior and told her that she'll go to bed early if she repeats it. She repeats it and is sent to bed early. She goes to bed kicking and screaming. If she's truly sorry, she might be given a second chance--especially if she asks for it. Sometimes instead of putting Noah in a time out or giving him a spanking, I will send him to his room for fifteen minutes. The idea is that if he can't play nicely with others, he'll have to play by himself. I'll stray from the black-and-white punishments or rewards if I can think of something a little more creative or a little more relevant. When someone slams a door, I ask them to open and close it quietly one time for each year of their age. It's good practice.

When I said don't be afraid to say no, I meant that we don't tiptoe around a no by only saying the why. I like to be direct with the children because they don't understand nuance and definitely don't understand sarcasm. And I do offer the why to go with the no more often than not. Like Jenny said, it's beneficial to say, "No! That's hot," rather than just no. Elm wondered if we ever have to say maybe and the answer is yes. If I have to say maybe then I'll usually offer the explanation as to why it might become yes or why it might become no. Diane had a good point: if we use no too much, our children will parrot the no back to us and that's a pain in the rear end. On the other hand, there are (rare) times when my answer is no and I will respond to the why with because I said so. Oh, motherhood can be tricky!

Colleen made a good point about saying yes. I don't want to tell the kids no for something like, "can you play with me," when I should be saying yes if it's possible--even when I'm tired.

Most importantly, we are as consistent as possible. Part 5 is scheduled for Thursday. I'm looking forward to your comments, messages, and suggestions!

On Instilling Discipline Part 3

This is third in a series written to exchange thoughts and theories on parenting with other moms. If you are tempted to think that I'm too serious, peek at the blog title! Please deposit your 2 cents in the Messages (comments) section! Don't hold back--I'd love to hear what you have to say!

---11---
Don't be afraid to say the word NO. A child asks, "can we go outside?" Some adults will answer, "it's raining and cold." What does that tell the child? The child is thinking, "you're right--it's raining. So can we go out?" I always answer the child's question directly. I say yes or I say no. Sometimes I offer an explanation, sometimes I don't. Sometimes I answer yes or no and then say, "do you want to know why?" Sometimes I wait for the child to ask because I want them to ask. When the two year old gets near the stove and reaches up, telling them, "that's hot," is not going to do much for them. Saying "NO!" is going to stop them in their tracks. Telling a three year old, "that will make a mess," doesn't mean NO to them. It means that will make a mess. They want to make a mess. Just because we think that the word NO has negative connotations doesn't mean we should avoid using it, especially with children.

---12---
Let the older children help the younger ones. I struggle with this because I think that the children are all my responsibility, that the older ones should not have to help out (I feel that I had too much responsibility for my siblings when I was growing up). For example, the girls can get Isaiah out of his clothes and into a swim diaper as long as his bedroom door is closed. It's very helpful! Morgan can make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Morgan and Madeleine can zip and unzip each other's dresses. Noah can help Isaiah reach his drink. Madeleine can read her school book to Morgan who can help her with the tricky words. They're proud to help each other. They should be helping and teaching one another!

---13---
Phrase it positively. If I want my child to stop doing something, I tell them what I WANT them to do. For example, instead of saying, "Noah! Stop touching the TV!" I say, "Noah, take your hand off of the television." I really think that these kids hear us like the Peanuts heard adults, so I always think that when I say, "don't tease your brother," they actually hear, "wa-wa-wa tease your brother."

---14---
Heard often in my house:
Please don't ask again.
Well done!
Because I said so.
Your dad is amazing!
Who's the boss?
I didn't ask if you wanted to; I told you to do it.
I love you.

---15---
Follow through! If I tell the children to stop doing something or to start doing something and they don't stop/start what I've told them to do I GET UP AND MAKE THEM DO IT. I don't sit in my chair and call over and over and over (although sometimes I'll count). Words don't always work. Have you ever seen those kids in the store or the park whose parents are sitting on benches calling and yelling and not getting anywhere? Everybody in the store knows the child's first and middle names except for that child. I'm glad that my kids don't go to school with those kids!

---16---
Let them make choices about the small things. Do you want to wear the orange shoes or the blue shoes? Do you want ice in your water? Do you want dessert? Do you want to wear a sweater or a jacket? Would you rather invite your cousins or your classmates for your birthday party? Would you like to use the purple shampoo or the green shampoo?

---17---
Choose your battles. A parent must always win the battle or the children get to be in charge. If I threaten something, I follow through. Because of that, I'm careful about what I threaten to do. If one of the children is behaving poorly at the zoo, I don't threaten to leave the zoo unless I'm willing to do it because that involves four unhappy children. If I threaten to leave the zoo and the child misbehaves again, we leave. I don't pick a battle that I don't have the energy or the will to win.

---18---
Allow children to experience small (safe) natural consequences. If you wear only a jacket, you're going to be cold. If you wear your crocs out this morning, your feet will get wet and cold. If you continue to wrestle near the coffee table, you're going to hit your head. Are you sure you think my coffee tastes good? Want a sip? It's 50 degrees outdoors. If you wear that skirt outside, you'll get cold. If you don't bring that drink along, you're going to be thirsty. You wanted to bring it along; I'm not going to carry it.

---19---
Offer a "next time" clause. Rather than becoming upset about little things that my children may or may not realize were wrong, I'll instruct them toward next time. Noah, remember that you can't stand on the toilet seat when you're using the sink. Next time, I want you to use the step stool. Morgan, next time you take a shower, I want you to hang up your towel afterward. Next time you want an apple, Madeleine, you must ask before you take it.

---20---
I say yes, too. Mom, may I have a third cookie? Can we go to the park with the lake? Can we invite Jane Doe over? Can we put on our swimsuits and dance in the rain? If I make a mess, will you get upset? Can we wash our cars with the hose? May I take pictures with your camera? Do we have the best daddy ever?

::

Part 4 is in the works.
What do you have to add?

The Simple Woman's Daybook Volume 18

March 30, 2009

Outside my window it is sunny and cool/warm, depending on what you're used to. It's 45 right now which is decent for 9:27 in the morning in Nebraska during the spring. It's supposed to get up to 58 today but tomorrow we're looking at a 50% chance of snow. The lawn is starting to green up a bit but I'm eager for the trees to turn their buds to leaves!

.

I am thinking about whether or not to take Morgan (7) to the doctor today. She's had a fever every day since Friday along with a head ache, a mild sore throat, a cough, and a runny nose. It could just be a virus but I'm a little worried that I'm missing something. To do or not to do, that is the question. Our copay is only $20 so that's not holding me back. What would you do?

Learning at school and at home... Morgan solved a tough word scramble this weekend, a first for her. I did not know that she could do it. I must underestimate my kids. Madeleine reads more words each week. Noah knows more of his letters than I thought--more than half--and Isaiah is just Isaiah in all of his nearly 2 year old glory.

I am thankful for... Facebook to use as a tool for keeping in touch with people.

I am wearing... jeans and a Tomac T-shirt, socks and mocs.

I am reading... the same as the last two weeks: Dark River.

I am hoping... for spring time without snow (shallow, I know).

I am creating, with the help of God, a happy, holy, healthy family.

Around the house... a new stove arrives on Thursday! Ours is from 1989 and is a glass top stove on which only one burner actually functions. The others sort of warm up a little. The oven works well but its door is perpetually stuck and must be yanked open and banged shut. The new stove has a convection oven. Yipee! Look for kolaches soon....

I recommend... a state park permit. Since Jeremy is also home sick and can stay home with Morgan, I'm going to put the boys in the van, pick up a park permit at a nearby grocery store, and go to the lake for a little while while the weather is nice.

One of my favorite things... my Canon Powershot. I dropped the old one when the lens was extended and it still works but not as well as I'd like. I put some of my fun money into a new Powershot this weekend. It's an A2000 IS, 10 MP and 6x zoom. What would I do without my Canon?

A few plans for the rest of the week... Bible study tonight, Girl Scouts (Daisies) tomorrow night, a meal to a friend with a newborn on Thursday.

A picture thought to share: Isaiah looks scared in this picture but he's actually excited. Can you imagine being excited when a dog as big as you jumps on you? :: Be sure to visit Peggy to read her Daybook and those of other women! ::

On Instilling Discipline Part 2

So I'm thinking that my earlier post on child rearing made the Laughing house (that's us) sound like it's flowing with milk and honey candy. No...I assure you, this is not the case. The incentives we offer are offered in moderation. After all, it's about behavior modification and maintenance, not about spoiling. We use incentives to ease the stress of a situation so that we're moving along rather than struggling. The last time that I had to use Smartees to get homework done was several months ago (and they, for some reason, don't expect this every time). Morgan cleaned up her room the other day, came down the stairs, and asked for a reward. I turned her down and explained that I just plain expected them to take care of their room and of their bathroom. But ...

There is definitely one area where I could use some advice. Well ... there are many areas that I could use advice, but let's start with this one. I know I need to give the children regular responsibility (jobs) around the house. I'm not sure why I haven't assigned regular chores to the children. I want to and I know I should. Maybe I think that I had too much responsibility at home when I was growing up or maybe I think it'd just be easier to do it myself most of the time. Whatever the reason, I need to get past it and start delegating. Does anyone have specific suggestions for this? How much do I expect from a seven year old? What do I expect of a four year old? What chores do you assign?

Parts 3 and 4 are coming soon!

Please deposit your 2 cents in the Messages/Comments section. Don't hold back!

On Instilling Discipline Part 1

The definition of an expert is one who has practiced actively in their field for 10 years. According to that definition, I am not yet an expert parent nor do I claim to be! I have been parenting for nearly seven years, though, which means I must carry at least a Master's degree, right? I'm not sure that a University or a panel of my peers would award me the degree but I'll write this anyway! I've learned a lot in the last seven years by trial and error and also by the example of other parents and the wisdom of the children's grandparents. Here we go with Part 1:

---1---

Clean up big messes piece by piece.
When there's a big mess in the basement (our toy room), I gather the children and come downstairs with a bowl of M&Ms or Skittles. I explain to them that we need to clean up the toy room and that after they pick up and put away 3 things, I will give them an M&M. Each child gets busy and is enthusiastic. We repeat, repeat, repeat until the room is clean. This works very well when Mom is nursing a baby and can't do much except sit.

---2---

Give incentives when tasks are difficult.

On days when it's very cold and I know that my kids need fresh air and exercise, I tell them that if they go outside for 20 minutes (or whatever is bearable) that they may have hot cocoa for a snack. If the children are unmotivated to get up and play or to read a book, I offer a small reward for X amount of minutes spent on the new activity. For example, Morgan had math homework that she was struggling with and she was crying and frustrated. I got a package of Smartees out of the cupboard. Everytime she would complete a problem without pouting, crying, or fussing, I would give her one Smartee. Gradually, I increased to two problems per Smartee, then three, then four, etc., until the worksheet was done. Instead of being stressed out, we were finished and happy!

---3---

Make a statement.
When I want my children to do something, I don't ask; I tell. For example, I want Noah to get dressed. I say, "Noah, I want you to get dressed, please." I do not say, "do you want to get dressed?" The second, a question, leaves him an option. He could say no and then I must insist which sometimes invites an argument. When I need to run errands, I say, "get your shoes on, please, and get into the car!" I do not say, "do you want to go run errands?" I ask only if I am certain of their answer .... "Do you want to go to Grandma's house?"

---4---

Time is on your side.
When it's time to turn off the TV or stop playing or is the end time to something fun, I always give a timed warning. Often, I set a timer. I'll say, "Morgan, Madeleine, Noah, you have five more minutes with the play dough. When the timer goes off, we're putting it away." Another example is, "when the timer goes off, we are turning off the television and going outside." They protest sometimes but they rarely put up a fuss when they know what's coming. The timer can be a mom's best friend. After all, if someone was going to shut off a TV show I was watching, I'd want to know ahead of time. If someone came in and shut the TV off in the middle of my show and told me to go outside, I'd be angry!

---5---

Time for sharing
Speaking of the timer, my sister-in-law taught me how to help small children share. When Child #1 has a toy that Child #2 wants, especially if it belongs to Child #2, the best way to help them share is to set a timer. I tell the children that I will set the timer. Child #1 has the toy for five more minutes. When the timer goes off, Child #2 will have the toy for five minutes, then repeat if necessary. By the time the second timer goes off, the children are usually busy with other things.

---6---

Yes, we spank occasionally.
I do not like spanking. I do spank my children when they need it. I spank for two types of offenses: blatant disrespect and dangerous behavior. Blatant disrespect is a broad category but mostly involves defiance toward an adult. Dangerous behavior is, for example, biking into the street, playing with something dangerous in the house (electrical outlet!) or pushing a sibling off of the swing set. When the offense takes place, I tell the child to go to my room and wait for me. I get the other children busy and go into my room with the first child, explain what they did wrong, and tell them that I'm going to spank. I deliver one spank for each year of the child's age. After that, they have a time out, at one minute per year of age, to cool off and collect themselves. After time out, they apologize and then I hug them to end the time out.

Spanking doesn't always go by the book--if one of my children continues a naughty behavior and they've had warnings and time outs, I will spank to get my point across. Happily, that doesn't happen often (I don't remember the last time I spanked one of the girls). I do not like to spank.

---7---

My kitchen is not a restaurant ...
... and I am not a short order cook. My children eat what I make or they do not eat. If they are struggling with something on their plate, I will tell them to take as many bites as they are years old. Morgan must take six bites. Maddie must take five bites. Noah takes four bites. The bites they are required to eat will allow them to be excused from the table. If they want dessert (on the rare occasion that I serve it) then they must eat everything. If they're struggling with something that I know they're capable of eating, I'll get cookies out of the cupboard as an incentive.

On the other hand, I do not force them to eat things like onions or salsa and the portions that I put on their plates are very small--less than I think they'll actually eat. I try to make things that taste good, are healthy, and are easy to put down. Morgan doesn't like plain tomatoes so I ask her to eat just one piece. Also, I don't ask my children whether or not they want a certain dish. I give them small amounts and I might ask if they want more. The only things I offer a choice on are desserts and condiments. This might surprise you: Madeleine will turn down dessert if she is full!

---8---

Catch the children doing good things.
When a child does something that makes me happy, I praise them. I try to notice things that they've done well and point out exactly what it is that pleased me. I praise my children often.

---9---

Don't take a vote if you can't predict the outcome.
When it is time to choose an activity or a movie for the whole family, I do not take a vote. Taking a vote only means that I could get four different opinions and only one person could end up happy (and the other three would make him miserable). When we are headed to the park, I pick the park. When we are going to pick up food, I pick the restaurant. Occasionally, I will take one child aside, perhaps the one who needs a little extra love on that day, and ask them what they want to do or eat. Otherwise, I make the decisions.

---10---

Let the kids get dirty.
I let my children play in sand and water, sometimes mud if we have adequate time to clean up. If it's messy outdoors where they want to play, I change them into darker clothing.

Part 2 is written and will be published soon.

What works for you?

Blustery Monday

We went down to my grandparents' home to spend the day on Monday. The girls did not have school! It was a very, very windy day but it was 70 degrees and fairly warm. We played outside for most of the day. I'll let the pictures tell the story, captions beneath. Isaiah is big enough now to ride this caterpillar; my grandparents bought it for my youngest aunt about 30 years ago! My grandpa recently trimmed his grapevines. They grow by the pond. Isaiah was excited to watch the horses. He spent most of his time outdoors running along the fence calling to them and watching them. When he saw Queen dip her mouth into the water to drink, he said, "Eeeewww! Icky!" Here, Isaiah ran along the fence in the direction that the horses were heading. The white horse is Lady, the tan horse is Queen. Noah asked Grandpa (Great-grandpa!) to set up the croquet set. Grandpa got it out, set it up, and they played on and off into the afternoon. Morgan's old sneakers had worn out. I got her a new pair at Wal-Mart the night before. She is pretty picky about what she wears and I tried to choose something that I thought she'd like. I chose purple. She was so excited! All day she told me how much she liked them. Grandma called them lavender at one point and that is how she refers to them now. The great part about kids is that they are unaware of brand names and expensive vs. cheap. She asked how much the shoes cost and I told her that they cost $10. She doesn't care what store they came from or how much they cost...she has shoes with lavender laces and lavender blossoms on the side and she is HAPPY. Kids are great. Throughout the summer and into the fall, Noah gathered Black Walnuts from beneath their tree, made piles of them, and threw them into the pond one by one. Now the walnuts have made it through winter but their tough outer shell peels off easily. He peeled these walnuts and stuffed them into his pockets. My grandparents are so excited about these tulips coming up. They traveled to Europe last fall and brought these tulip bulbs back from Holland. Grandpa said that they bought eight. All eight have come up! Isaiah rode this tractor around. His legs are too short for the pedals and he doesn't know how to steer so I pushed him a little. Many, many grandchildren have ridden this tractor! I laugh every time I see this clamp holding the tire onto the tractor. It's been there for years, is a permanent fixture, and hasn't failed yet...the wheel is still there! Madeleine wanted me to take her picture with the balloons on her head. Silly girl! Once the children grow taller, it is hard for me to remember what it was like to look down on their little bodies. Isaiah is nearly two and it won't be long until he's looking down on me! Isaiah and I walked down to the pond and sat on the dock for awhile. When it's windy and I sit on the dock and look straight ahead, it feels as if I'm on a boat moving down a river. It's a very peaceful feeling. This ash is left over from the fire that Grandpa built for us the first time we went ice skating this winter! The fire was built toward the end of December! Grandpa mentioned today that he has seen the ashes and so I went to look for them. I wonder how long it will be before the water level rises and covers it up?Noah, Morgan, Madeleine, and I went on a mussel shell hunt. We walked all the way around the edge of the pond looking in the mud and shallow water for shells. Raccoons eat the mussels and cast the shells aside. We found bits and pieces along the west shore and then on the east shore we came upon a pile. I think that a raccoon either had one big feast or several small meals in one spot. They kids loved digging them up! I told the kids that we would need to carry them back and they exclaimed, "ew, mud..." as if they've never played in mud before. I said that we didn't have a bag and that I would carry them back. At this point, Noah started jumping up and down and said, "wait, wait, Mom! I have a bag!" The little squirt had a Spiderman party favor bag in his pocket! Noah and Madeleine cleaned the mud off of their shells with Grandpa's watering can. These buds were all over a tree near the house. I'm not sure what kind of tree it is. Spring is here! It was windy because there was a front coming through. Soon the clouds began to appear dark and full of rain! The temperature lowered rapidly. We had a brief thunderstorm in the early evening and then the sun came out. This is the view looking east from the back porch. The black sky against a yellow field always strikes me as beautiful. Grandpa says that this field (the hill in the back of the picture) will be soybeans this year. The bud pictured earlier was on this tree. I didn't notice how red it was until after it had rained and I was taking pictures of the sky. Come on, spring! Isaiah kissed grandma goodbye.

Grandma sent home three blankets with us. Each child picked their own blanket without fighting! They took them to their beds and when they came downstairs this morning, said, "oh, mmmmmmm, my blanket smells like Grandma's house!" This was a little piece of Heaven for them. They know where comfort and love is found! Me, too.

Thank you, Grandpa and Grandma!

Only In a House With Kids...

...would you find these things in the clean laundry, over a period of weeks: one Polly Pocket mirror, two barrettes, one pony tail holder, one marble, one Bakugan, one quarter, one pair of tweezers, two clothespins, one rubber ball, one tinker toy, one clip, two keyrings, one matchbox car, one eraser, two things I don't know the name of, and an outlet cover. It sounds like a list of things that the Very Hungry Caterpillar ate!

...would there be 23 orphaned socks after the laundry has been cleaned, folded, and put away.

...would a mother have to draw a line on her own kitchen floor to show her young children where they CANNOT wrestle nor tickle nor chase nor do cartwheels nor whine nor tiptoe nor BE while she is making supper.

The Simple Woman's Daybook Volume 17

Outside my windows, which are open, the wind is gusting and the air smells so fresh and sweet. Thunderstorms are brewing!

I am thinking... about how hypocritical members of our Congress (House of Reps + Senate) are. They are up in arms about bonuses being given to AIG employees. While bonuses to employees of a failing company smells fishy to me, I am reserving judgement. But many members of Congress are ready to tax those bonuses to death because they believe that employees of failing companies do not deserve bonuses. Well, the U.S. Government is in the red. The government is spending more than its earning. I conclude that members of Congress, if they are willing to take away the bonuses of private corporations, should be willing to forgo their own perks, including lifetime pay, insurance, and retirement benefits. After all, their business is, by their own definition, a failure.

Learning at school and at home... As I observe my children, I see Morgan becoming the type of girl who will love art and theater. She is always drawing and writing. I see Madeleine becoming an athlete. She is always running around, riding her bike, throwing herself into everything that she does. I'm wondering if Noah will be our bookworm. He loves to look at books and to learn new things. Isaiah is definitely the clown and possibly an athlete.

I am thankful for... being Catholic and the parish that we're members of, our health, nice weather, family, and friends.

I am wearing... jeans and a T-shirt, a necklace that my late grandmother gave to me, socks, and crocs.

I am reading... the same as last week: Dark River.

I am hoping... that the weather will hold tomorrow (no severe thunderstorms or strong winds) so that I can visit my grandparents without worrying about the safety of the hour long drive.

I am creating, with the help of God, a happy, holy, healthy family.

Around the house... laundry, laundry, laundry! If it makes the rest of you feel better, we've all been going down to the laundry room every morning for socks for about a week. I'm waaay behind. Good weather does that to a mom!

I recommend... the movie Dan in Real Life. Jeremy and I rented it a couple of weeks ago. I almost wish that we'd bought it--that's how much we enjoyed it. It's clean, has a good plot, and is so very funny.

One of my favorite things... baptisms. We went to the baptism of a cousin's son this morning. What a beautiful sacrament of initiation it is. I love Catholic tradition. There are only a few things that make me happy-weepy: marriage, birth, and baptism.

A few plans for the rest of the week... Visit my grandparents, card party on Saturday evening.

Here are picture thoughts to share...Noah, Madeleine, and Morgan were dressed up for Mass and a baptism this morning. These are the girls' Easter dresses.

Isaiah is so tired, as he was held through Mass, a baptism, and was sitting at the lunch table an hour past his usual nap time! He was such a good boy today.

:: Be sure to visit Peggy to read her Daybook and those of other women! ::

Yes, We Do

By Morgan, age 6 1/2

7 Quick Takes Friday Volume 11

Visit Jennifer at Conversion Diary for more quick takes!

---1---

I would like to rename Rockstar. It will now be called

Nap in a Can.

Thanks from all the tired moms everywhere who don't have time for a real nap.

---2---

Have you ever watched a celebrity on the red carpet? The photographers and gossip mongers journalists call out, shoot pictures, and fight each other to ask questions. "Julia, over here!" "Angelina, how is life with seventeen kids!?" "Brad, look at me!" "Dave, smile!"

When I walk through a room with all of my kids in it, I feel like a celebrity on the red carpet. "Mom! Look at this!" "Mom, can I have this?" "Mom! Will you do this for me?" "Mom! I love you!" All that's missing are the flash bulbs.

---3---

Beware: moral content!

In America, the purchase and consumption of alcohol is legal only for people 21 and older. The brains of people under 21 cannot process alcohol the same way that older adults can. We don't whisper to teens that they can have beer, just don't get caught (or we shouldn't). We expect them to abstain from alcohol. There are legal penalties for those who disobey.

Why, then, does society say to teens that they should abstain from sex until marriage but whisper instructions for methods of birth control? I don't want pregnancy or STDs for teens either but we can expect them to exercise some self control. After all, we're training them to be responsible, disciplined adults, not life-long adolescents.

---4---

Beware: moral content!

Speaking of sex, there are natural consequences (consequence sounds negative, but its definition is this: "that which follows something on which it depends; that which is produced by a cause; a result"). If you eat too much ice cream, you gain weight. If you don't want to gain weight, don't eat too much ice cream. We find it repulsive for someone to eat ice cream and then vomit or take a bite and swish it around in their mouth and spit it out to avoid the caloric intake--but the person still got to taste it. Birth control is repulsive to me as much as self-induced vomiting. If you don't want to become pregnant, do not have sex during fertility...don't binge and purge.

---6---
Having friends over makes a day go by so quickly.

Here's the math: 3 Moms + 15 kids - (3 in school) = acceleration of time

---7---

Thanks, Uncle Joel and Aunt Carrie, for the "karate chopsticks from Taiwan." They are currently being tested in blueberry consumption!

Interview With My Children

1. What is something mom always says to you?
Morgan: I love you
Madeleine: I love you
Noah: Love you
Mom: Go outside.

2. What makes mom happy?
Morgan: hugs and kisses
Madeleine: I hug her a lot and I kiss her a lot
Noah: clean up!
Mom: no fighting

3. What makes mom sad?
Morgan: not listening to her
Madeleine: if I don't hug her, she feels sad if Isaiah hits her
Noah: not hugs and kisses from us
Mom: fighting, not taking care of belongings

4. How does your mom make you laugh?
Morgan: tickling
Madeleine: tickling
Noah: tickle me

5. What was your mom like as a child?
Morgan: A good reader. She likes reading.
Madeleine: Happy, nice, listening to Nana
Noah: Hugs and kisses.

6. How old is your mom?
Morgan: 30
Madeleine: 15
Noah: 13
Mom: Morgan is the closest.

7. How tall is your mom?
Morgan: 10 feet tall
Madeleine: 500,000
Noah: 100 tall
Mom: 5' 6"

8. What is her favorite thing to do?
Morgan: hang out with us
Madeleine: smile
Noah: kisses
Mom: ...and hang out with Daddy

9. What does your mom do when you're not around?
Morgan: miss us
Madeleine: clean
Noah: miss us (he's parroting)
Mom: go out on dates with Daddy

10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for?
Morgan: cook
Madeleine: Seth [my Navy brother]
Mom: Mom never wants to be famous. Ever.

11. What is your mom really good at?
Morgan: tickling
Madeleine: games
Noah: walking (this comes from a conversation awhile back when he asked why I don't fall all the time like he does...I told him that as people get older, they get better at walking.)
Mom: multitasking

12. What is your mom not very good at?
Morgan: I don't know.
Madeleine: soccer ball
Noah: coloring

13. What does your mom do for her job?
Morgan: what job?
Madeleine: a mom and you take care of us
Noah: cleaning up
Mom: What job? $%#@&! That's a whole new post (that was funny, though).

14. What is your mom's favorite food?
Morgan: Soup
Madeleine: noodles
Noah: noodles
Mom: grilled salmon, scallops, any seafood.

15. What makes you proud of your mom?
Morgan: making my bed
Madeleine: helping me clean my room sometimes and throwing the trash away
Noah: cleaning up with me

16. If your mom were a cartoon character, who would she be?
Morgan: Bambi's mom
Madeleine: Madeline Aubrey head
Noah: Sarah!
Mom: She-Ra, Princess of Power

17. What do you and your mom do together?
Morgan: nothing (she's pouting now after getting in trouble)
Madeleine: buy stuff at the store
Noah: play games
Mom: learn!

18. How are you and your mom the same?
Morgan: I was born in you
Madeleine: our skin
Noah: our whole family's the same
Mom: Morgan is the same as me. Maddie is like her Dad. Noah is somewhere inbetween.

19. How are you and your mom different?
Morgan: our hair
Madeleine: our hair
Noah: we don't have the same hair

20. How do you know your mom loves you?
Morgan: because you buy us things
Madeleine: because you take care of us
Noah: because you always say it
Mom: this is a good example of their love languages. What they said is very telling!

21. Where is your mom's favorite place to go?
Morgan: Great Wolf Lodge!
Madeleine: Colorado!
Noah: Colorado Hot Springs!
Mom: They all win!

Overheard

Madeleine: Do you know what a leprechaun is?

Noah: What's a leprechaun?

Madeleine: A leprechaun is a small human that jumps high. It wears green and likes gold.

Evening at the Lake

It's a beautiful day to visit the lake! Morgan and Noah enjoy snacks at the picnic table while Grandma swings Maddie and Isaiah in the background. We walked down to the water's edge and the kids were busy throwing stuff in. Left to right: Morgan, Noah, Isaiah, Grandma Grandma helps Isaiah draw in the sand with a stick. Isaiah points at something in the water. He loves to be outdoors, even when it's cold. Lucky for us, it was 70 degrees! This is Noah, Isaiah, me, Maddie, and Morgan. These are the best parents-in-law a girl could hope for!

My crazy brother-in-law asked about the lake water, "is it cold?"

"Well, there was ICE in it about a week ago, so I bet it's cold," I replied.

He stuck his feet in it anyway. He can't help it; he was raised in California. He said that it was so cold that it hurt. From left: Noah, Maddie, Morgan, and Evie (my niece/their cousin) Morgan and Maddie make shapes in the sand while the waves lap up and erase them. I couldn't stop taking pictures of Isaiah with his new haircut. He looks like a little boy now and less like a baby. *sigh* Isaiah cuddled his godmother Carrie. His godfather is in the background. They just returned from a nearly three month stay in Asia! Morgan carried Ethan, her one year old cousin, around the beach. Evie and Noah work together on one of Noah's favorite activities--throwing things (rocks) into the water. Grandpa and Isaiah strolled back up toward the picnic table. Uncle Joel had Noah in a headlock. Grandma took Isaiah on a walk. Morgan and Noah walked along the shore. If you look closely, you will see Canada Geese flying low over the water. Morgan loved digging in the sand. This is Evie's tiny footprint next to the tinier footprint of an animal. Morgan smiled but the wind was blowing! The sun was shining. It was a beautiful evening. Noah gathered rocks to throw into the water. If you look closely, you can see the kids out on this little spit of land. Isaiah is such a clown. All of the time, he's trying to entertain people. He was so happy to be outdoors and with his grandparents, aunt, uncle, cousins, and siblings (and me) that he was dancing and running at the same time. Here, Isaiah is trying to hand Ethan a handful of sand. Isaiah and Ethan are 9 months apart in age. The girls helped Ethan up the little hill toward the grassy area. Isaiah holds his sandwich.

My, how Noah loves to throw things into the water and watch the splash and find out whether it floats or sinks. Toward the end of the evening, it got chilly and all of the kids ended up in their sweatshirts. Maddie loves this pink sweatshirt. The sunset makes it look even pinker!

11131