HysterSister 2: John's Birth

Note: John's birth and the hysterectomy took place in December of 2012.

As we prepared for John's birth, there were a few things that I wanted in place.  First, I knew that the risk of blood loss with this type of surgery is high.  There was a chance that I would need a transfusion.  I asked my Dr if his daughter was in my place, if he would be comfortable with her receiving blood from the community supply, or if he would want her to have a directed donation.  He preferred a directed donation.  My first mission was to find another A+ person who would be willing to bank a unit of blood for me.  Very quickly, my mother-in-law volunteered.

The next item of business was ensuring that I wouldn't have to be alone during recovery.  The worst part of a cesarean delivery is the part where Jeremy and the baby leave and I am alone in the recovery room with my (very wonderful) nurses.  My mom (a PA) agreed to come down and wait through surgery, then wait in recovery with me, then make sure my pain was under control after the spinal wore off.  That was another fear of mine, that my pain would be out of control after the spinal wore off, as it had been when Maria was born.  

I was slightly nervous about having to be put under, as the surgeon had said they could keep me awake for John's birth but would have to put me out to finish the surgery.  But a friend was reassuring and said that being under was better than any nap she'd ever had.  

I thought I had things all lined up according to MY plan when my MIL called to say that the blood bank wouldn't take her blood because of dental work she'd had done within a year.  We could have had Jeremy tested or my dad would have been tested for me, and I was considering those options.

Next, I found out that my mother could NOT wait in recovery with me.  When I protested that she had once before, the nurse said that I'd be on the FIRST floor while my baby went up to the FOURTH floor and that the rules on the first floor for surgery and recovery were different than on the fourth floor (4th = labor and delivery).  WTH!?  Not only do I not get my comfort person, but my husband and newborn child will be separated from me by FLOORS!?  

Who is in control here!?  

Oh, yeah.  God's the boss.  

After much prayer and thought, I did not pursue a blood donation.  I thought if God knew I'd need it, then he would provide it.  Maybe allowing my donor to be rejected was his way of telling me that I wouldn't need it?  What was he trying to tell me by allowing me to be separated from my baby by floors?  Ugh.  Although I now realized that God is in charge, my anxiety skyrocketed.  

Knowing that it could be an hour or several hours before I could nurse John, I wanted him to be with a nurse that I knew and trusted.  There's a woman in our parish--Katy--who is a nursery nurse and so I contacted her and asked if she could come to John's birth, if she was in that day.  She said she would!  

::

We woke the day of surgery and headed to the hospital.  All the way there, we listened to Strawberry Swing.  I don't think I'll ever forget that.  not counting Jeremy, John, and me.  Rare surgery indeed.

We had two hours of prep, and then toward the elevators.  AT the elevators, it was time for shift change (7:00) and a nurse came running up to trade with my nurse.  Bonus: it was Elizabeth, a lady from our parish who all my friends positively adore (and me too, now!).  We entered the operating room.  People kept filing in and filing in, and then my own Dr came in, stopped by me, and said I should have charged admission.  There were FIFTEEN people in the delivery room,

The anesthesiologist came to visit with me.  She didn't want to put me under.  She wanted to keep me awake and comfortable the whole surgery!   I talked to her about the pain following Maria's delivery and she seemed irritated that it had happened and promised that she would take good care of me.  (She did.)

It took awhile to get me numb, but then surgery began.  At one point, everything stopped and the surgeon said, "Will you look at that?"  Then business resumed and John was out and crying!  They held him up and then took him to check him over.  Very quickly, they brought him to me and Elizabeth, Katy, and Jeremy helped me hold him and took pictures.  

They turned the table slightly so my body was at an odd angle, and began the rest of the surgery.  Even when Jeremy and John left for the nursery, I was comfortable because Elizabeth and my anesthesiologist stayed with me talking and doing a good job distracting me.  Then I was off to recovery, then back up in my room a half hour after that.  The surgeon had finished everything in a mere 45 minutes and I had no staples!  There were no complications; nothing was nicked or injured, and there was no bleeding that required a transfusion.  It was a textbook cesarean-hysterectomy.  

The fun part is when I got back to my room and Jeremy was there with Mandy and John.  Oh, I almost forgot!  I called Mandy (Jeremy's sister and John's godmother) the day before surgery and asked whether she'd be willing to come up to the nursery about the time that Jeremy and John would arrive there.  I didn't want Jeremy to be alone either.  She had met him there and watched John's bath.  When I got back to my room and called my mom--she had been put in a waiting room and couldn't find anyone.  She joined us.  The most special part of the day was a surprise that Jeremy had kept for me: he hadn't let anyone hold John until I had.  So John nursed a little while and we cuddled and called the kids to tell them the news of their brother, then Nana and Aunt Mandy cuddled him too.  

Before long, Jeremy's parents brought the kids up and they happened to meet Monsignor (our pastor) in the hallway.  They got to meet John all together!  There was a parade of visitors over the weekend, another nursery-nurse who is a friend was on duty and cared for John one night, a few bumps in the road, a fever that made the hospital stay an extra day, and cable television.  It was a good five days.  

God did indeed have everything under control.  

I really do need to trust him more often.  

7 Quick Takes: Momtakes

1.  The swish-swish of a little diapered bottom running around the house is one of my favorite sounds.  It makes me smile.  I also love the thump-thump of the feet of a toddler who has mastered walking and finds it too slow a method of movement so has begun to run everywhere instead.

2.  It is funny every time when John starts to bob his head and mimic dancing movement when he hears music.  He looks like a cockatiel.  He also does it when there's a rhythmic and/or repetitive sound, like the neighbor's weekend hammer-on-anvil noise.  His current favorite song is Waka Waka, and he loves anything from Frozen, especially In Summer.  

3.  We have entered the communicating phase, as opposed to the scream-til-you-get-it phase.  He will point and gesture, make sounds, and indicate what he wants.  They've been different for every child.  John will spot what he wants and make a gentle desperate-laughter sort of sound to tell me that's what he wants.  Then I ask, for example, "do you want a drink?" and he'll respond with one sharp nod and "ah" which comes from his German DNA and means, "yah".

4.  All of our children have had a blankie--a security blanket.  John does too, and it is the blanket that my grandma made for him.  He loves it so much that Morgan made him a "fake" blankie.  It's a smaller version of the real thing, made from the same fabric.  He loves it too.  He tells me he's tired by going to his room, fishing one of his blankies out from the rungs of his crib, finding a pacifier somewhere, and then doing this wherever he finds me:

5.  As long as it's cool/cold outside (welcome to Nebraska), I really do leave him in his jammies almost all day.  If it's warm enough to play outside, I put his moccasins on over his PJs and let him go.  Jammies are great.  It took me til child #5 to give myself permission to just let them wear pajamas all day long.

6.  Maria (4) and I were watching Dave Matthews Band live-concert videos today.  She said, "Mom!  I want to go to the movie with only people!"  Meaning--I desperately need to attend a Dave Matthews Band concert with you, Mommy.  That's my girl.

7.  Morgan (12) is writing an outline and just called to me from the computer, "Mom!  How do you get the computer to make Roman Numerals?"  I did keep a straight face while helping her think through it. A hundred points for Mom.

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